Sob Sob - Sat 12 May

The last week has been full of emotions!  Blame being a female as it 'grounded' me for two days and I wasn't able to do any work outs.  Friday I barely made it to the gym for my Zumba class with Kylie which I love and I literally had to go into 'Robot' Mode as I was so lacking of care, energy and co-ordination!  I also forgot my HRM so I had no idea what my calorie burn was but probably no more than a tic tac.  LOL Just kidding I'm sure I did about 300 calories but no where near my usual 600+ and so that also made me feel disheartened and all I wanted to do was go home and cry!

I think back to Biggest Loser when Brenda was on there and Michelle saying to her 'why are you crying' and she just couldn't tell me and I feel a bit like this today.  I guess some of it is just that I'm upset with myself for not being more excited about going to the gym.  My get up and go has literally 'gone' and I'm upset because 'I'm better than this, I deserve better than this and today I just suck, I can't seem to follow the dance moves and get into it, I feel like I'm wasting my time and why am I not good'?  A million questions all racing through my head but I just wipe them away.

I at least JFDI!  I went, I gave it a go, I didn't come home and fall into chocolate like I had been thinking about for the past 20 minutes I just came home and logged onto facebook.

In the evening I went to my Burlesque class and even in the middle of that shed a quiet tear or two.  I also just seemed to have no energy or co-ordination for a class that I love.  I'm blaming hormones!

I convide in my facebook 12wbt buddies and of course they were very supportive - love you guys, the biggest surprise was my girlfriend who is a PT who said she was totally surprised by my outburst saying that I'm strong in character and have achieved a lot in the last twelve weeks.  I posted how this journey is about mindset as tonight I feel like I was before I started on the 12wbt and still feel like the 'fat girl'.  I literally looked in the mirror to say no you are not but it was like I was looking into nothing....

Came home to just sit on the couch and chill out without the chocolate again so I'm proud of that but still why are females so emotional at times.  No wonder men can't work us out!  If we can't work ourselfs out at times what chance do males have LOL.

So another small bump in the road for my journey but it's all good we keep moving....

Pre-Season Task 'Get Real' - No Excuses - Tues 8th May

Round 2 - 12 Week Body Transformation - Ding Ding - BRING IT!!!

Mish makes us do Pre-Season Tasks to help us get our head into the right mind set and as I've heard many times - 'Train the Mind and the Body with follow', how many times have you heard someone say the mind will give up well before the body does.

I've seen this many times before with real life and on the Biggest Loser and even doing it myself going OMG I can't do that or you stop to have a second think before doing something.  

So we watch the video and list our excuses.  They are broken up into various areas of internal (eg self talk I'm tired etc) to external - (eg weather, family illnesses etc).  I've watched the video twice now to make sure that I've heard all I need to hear!

My previous round I only joined the night before so didn't have a lot of time to dedicate to the pre-season tasks - even though I did them and felt that I understood them this round I'm here to NAIL them and be the best I can be!

My top excuses that I have listed are :

Internal  (all about me and what I'm feeling) within my control

I'm too tired / too sore / too lazy / not motivated

    - I think we all have these and let's face it this is just where you need to pul out the JFDI 

       (Just Friggen Do It) card, book in the workout as an appointment and then go and do it!

SOLUTION - JFDI & think about how much you want this!  Think about where you want to be in 12 weeks time, be glad that your ON the journey  and also adopt ROBOT MODE!  Also the pain from the workout will not last forever the soreness is something to embrass knowing that I have 'stepped it up' in my training!

Mish talks that a lot of people have 'a lack of motivation' but I've learnt that I just have to go into Robot Mode and if I've planned a workout then I'm just going to do it and be happy that there's another one done and dusted!

I'd be able to do it with someone else...

 - in the past I have spent a lot of time looking for someone to take 'walks' with and also proabably someone to have as many excuses as me but as I learnt from the last round.  I can't rely on anyone but me.  I have met many like minded people but sometimes after agreeing to go to the same gym session they haven't rocked up so I've been dissapointed.

SOLUTION - I decided that it's just about me and if other's come along the journey with me that's great but I need to have my own head space right I can't spend time pumping up a lot of others as they have to want to do it for themselves and I get that - as this was me a while ago.

I'm scared of success

 - although I'm really happy with that I have done so far why aren't I still forging ahead in between rounds I'm backing off on training I am releasing the wheels a little so I don't burn out and I guess just to take stock of what I have done and to take time to really focus on where I want to go next.

SOLUTION - ask for help, make a plan and express my concerns who are there to support and encourage me on this journey!

External (pointing finger at other things but still within my control)

I'm too busy

 - I think I proved last round that I wasn't too busy as I backed off on a lot of my work committments and while I do feel a little sad that I'm not as successful as I was last year with work I also see that I wasn't really all that happy with aspects of my work and also the extra stress was weighing me down.  It did lead to a lot of the reasons why I was carrying so much extra weight I was doing a lot of stuff to please other's and not for myself so I made 2012 the year for ME! 

SOLUTION - Make an appointment with myself and be done with it!  That's my TIME.  I'm being a better person to make myself happy and if I'm happy then the family will be happy (as they say Happy Life = Happy Wife... LOL).  Also have my gym bag ALWAYS ready to go and even in the car so I don't waste time with transition.

Expenses

- I will budget the money to do the things I need to do.  I already have the gym membership and have worked out the best deals for me to do my other things like Zumba.  For something that I really love to do I will find a way to find the $$$.  

SOLUTION - I'd rather spend money now on prevention rather than spend more time, energy and $$$ on trying to heal myself from constant health issues of being overweight!  Also a lot of Mish's program you can do outside you don't need anything special

External Excuses (out of the blue and out of my control)

My son's meltdowns

 - my son has mild autism he's 9 years old but has difficult times at school and often needs to come home early for his safety and mine (and our sanity) I need to bring him home.  

SOLUTION - I should have trained already for the day - or I will have the evening to do my training when my hubby is home!

Family Illness

 - nothing is ever planned is it!

SOLUTIONS - same as above

I'm taking FULL responsibility for MYSELF!  I'm a WOMAN OF MY WORD!!!

Biggest Loser - WINNER ~ Tues 8th May

Well I've sat on the edge of my seat watching the Finale of the Biggest Loser and my favourite WON - Well Done to Margie and also CONGRATS to Michelle Bridges - WOO HOO finally a winner for her and proof that her training WORKS!!!

I just feel like I want to get up and run around the block and start smashing it but it's 10.38pm at night so I think I'll leave the 'smashing' for the gym tomorrow!

I'm so proud of Margie for someone with so much weight to loose she really is an inspiration to me and I love her sense of humour.

I'm a little sad that the Biggest Loser is over for another season because there were so many things that happened that I thought wow I could blog about that as i feel the same way but would forget or run out of time.  

I am really looking forward to this next round of 12wbt!

Zumba Club Style ~ Friday 4th May

Happy 'May the Fourth be with you - Star Wars Day' - also it happens to be my son's 9th birthday today and we gave him some star wars lego so double gold stars for me there! Tee Hee!

David & I at the 'sweatfest' Zumba Club - my hair was everywhere!!! Love it!!!

David took this picture of me doing Zumba - NO idea what I was doing at that point in time as I'm the only one doing something different from everyone else but that's what Zumba is all about adding your own flava to stuff!  I don't really think I look all the best with the picture but oh well it's just another 'before picture' Tee Hee!!!

Tonight was amazing I went to my first Zumba Club Style it ran for just over 3 hours and boy what a total sweat fest!  There wasn't as many people in there as I thought but certainly a smaller area than I expected and the floor was quite sticky but that's ok because in some area's there wasn't a lot of space on the dance floor so you just moved right where you were.

I still had a really great time and smashed through 1750 calories in those 3 hours.  Every now and again I would take a small break and some songs were really hard to follow as I had no idea what they were so you can't move along as much (now I know how a lot of new people feel when they come to Zumba).

After Zumba I made a new friend on facebook which was really good we have both been on the 12wbt journey but she said that she was beside me and was able to follow my feet a bit instead of the instructors.  It made me feel really happy because this is the about the third time I've had someone say to me they seem to be able to follow what I do.  I thought I recognised the girl from the 12wbt facebook page but I was too nervous to go to her and say hi.  

The club that it was situated at was proabably a decent 15 - 20 minute walk from the train station and so I decided to run there I got about half way before I coughed up a lung on the sidewalk and then realised I only had less than 5 minutes to walk so I just slowed down a bit.  It was great as I was able to catch an earlier train home.  It's great being fit and healthy!!!

FINALE!!! - Wed 2nd May

Today is the day.... last weigh in!!!

WOO HOO ~ I lost 2kgs this week - probably purely by the grace of god as you know I was unwell Mon & Tues.  So my finale  stats over the past twelve weeks =

Weight total lost 12kgs

11.6% of my body weight gone!

49cm's gone from all over (boobs, legs, arms, waist & hips *thank you Zumba lol)

Here is my before and after pictures

 

 (I'm not game to put my undies pictures up yet until I'm down some more ... tee hee)

I am a little sad that it's all over but now begins the rest of my life.  This is a change for the better not just a 12 week diet plan.  It's about changing my lifestyle and being the best possible version of myself I can be!

I got to Zumba this AM which was great and so many gym peeps said that they missed me which was so lovely because it's nice to know I am missed.  I feel a little embarrased at times because the instructor will tell everyone how hard I work and that I do burn a lot of calories but also I must admit I do love it as it encourages me to work even harder as I wonder if anyone is watching me!

I really struggled with today's Zumba which was surprising to me after not doing any exercise for the past two days.  I watch my HRM not just for calories but to see what my Heart Rate is doing and it would shoot up to 186+ very quickly it hit 208 at one point and I felt so hot and could really feel my heart beating fast so I slowed down a bit I was sweating so much - at the end of the session I had only burnt 690 which surprised me for what I was 'feeling' but still I'm happy just goes to proove what your body goes through when you aren't well.

I got to have lunch with my lovely friend who is also a PT and she often shows me through a few things in the gym.  We had a good chat about things which was great it's always good to battle out ideas and theories with someone else to either find out if you completely crazy or on the right track.

Oh finally - a funny positive - I went through my mobile phone to update my contacts and realised that I had takeaway joints in there that I haven't needed to call in the past 12 weeks so I deleted them and that felt really good!

 

I have really enjoyed this journey and am planning on coming back to do Round 2 12wbt.  I know a few of my friends are going to be returning and I plan on smashing it up!!!

Nearly There.... ~ Tues 1st May

Tonight is the last night before FINALE weigh in I'm actually really excited more than nervous I know I have done the best I can with that the last week.

Saturday did the usual Zumba and forgot to ask Lisa for my next 'step' that she's going to teach me last month (or two) was all about the hips LOL and the hips have worked alright I've dropped another 3cms around my waist and 2cms from my hips!  Woot!!!

Sunday was a rest day which was a blessing indisguise as I wasn't feeling the best I got a new smart phone as my old mobile had died.  I haven't had a smart phone before so am really excited.  Over the two year plan I have it's only going to cost me $48 extra so thats exciting!  I am more impressed with all of the apps I can get (it's android) incuding some run and gps programs so I will be able to focus on my learn to run program next 12wbt round.

I also got a spray tan from a friend of mine mostly as she wanted to try out her new products but also as a gift to me for all the hard work I've done with my weightloss.  I wore the same pants that I once wore before my 12wbt started and they were so baggy, nearly falling off - I jokingly said 'hey you said to wear loose pant's'!!! 

Monday I woke up quite ill with swollen lymph nodes in my neck and a sore throat and the room spun if I moved too fast so I figured I shouldn't head out today.  I went on another course of antibiotics.  I made sure I ate clean today as you need to make a sacrific should you fall down in one area as Mish tell's us.

Tuesday (today) I have felt still quite Ill all day not dizzy thank god but my neck is still tender to touch so I'm taking today as a rest day but tomorrow back to Zumba as I don't want to miss too much and also I'm getting to have lunch with a very good friend of mine who happens to be a PT.  I got up quite often today to do some housework and felt completely drained of energy so mentally I have said that today is the last rest day and tomorrow I will be back full of action.

I'm going to be strong minded and put the positive energy into place!  Train the mind and the body will follow.

So sadly I haven't had any last chance training but this is life and it's learning to maintain this as a lifestyle and dealing with all the little road bumps along the way!

Well that's it from here!  Talk to you tomorrow......